More fun than googling your own name...

Google your image! Enter your name into the google search box, click IMAGE SEARCH and see what you come up with.. I found a pair of socks with my name on them. Turns out they're a tribute to a famous triathlete who lost his battle with skin cancer. Still, it's my name too!



I also image searched my wife and came up with... Her!


From her radio station promo shot. Pretty eh!

Give it a go yourself, search your name and see if you can find yourself, or see what other people with your name look like, then search your partner and the ex you haven't got over yet...

Gorgeous and Gormy in the same photo..


Daughter Sophie's nearly 6 weeks old now, and will probably never forgive me for putting this on the internet. Course, by the time she's grown up, the internet will have probably gone the way of cassettes and us old farts will be saying how different it was in our day.

I got a complaint today

While I've had complaints before, this one really hit me where it hurts. Normally, I can see the point of view of the complainant, enough that I can reply and put them at ease, explain my reasoning or write them off as a nutbar with too much time on their hands. This time though, I can't actually fathom their problem. Help me out.

To follow is a transcript of a voicebreak I did at 7.30 tonight. Read it, take it in and think about the words I've used because straight after saying this, a woman rang up and called me racist, sexist and she hoped that I would rot in hell. She hung up before I could respond to her.

These are the exact words I said on air:

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We had a wonderful experience in Cornwall Park with a cow today. I'll explain, it was giving birth and all these people had stopped to have a look at this cow giving birth. And there was all sorts of people. Some Asians were walking in those funny zoot suit thingees they wear, there was an Indian family, there was this know it all farmer commentating - he was quite interesting actually. Some mums, kids in pushchairs all watching this cow give birth. This cow, she didn’t complain, she didn’t bitch about her midwife, she didn’t get the epidural, she just lay in the sun and gave birth to her young calf while we from all walks of life watched on. Nature was happening right there in front of us and it was a moment. Definitely a moment.

I mean this cow was a trooper, she didn't even use the gas or pethedine or anything! it was a really nice moment.

I love Cornwall Park because it's a farm right in the middle of the city, but it's so far removed from the city.

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Remember, we're a family focussed radio station and my wife has just been through the birth process with me at her side. That's something that I've spoken of a lot on air.

I'm no Stables, Devlin or Laws, I'm not a smart arse kid and I'm not here to offend, while I'll take the piss, I won't be cruel. In short, I'm not looking for trouble or notoriety on air. I'm here to entertain and relate to an adult audience. That's it. I thought there was something special about walking through a park with my wife and one month old daughter and seeing a baby calf being born.

Is it offensive to even mention that someone is of a particular race or culture if that is what they are or should we talk of everyone in generic terms?

Is it wrong to marvel at nature, and be amazed at how other species on this planet get by with so much less than what we humans have?

Is there anything in there that anyone could consider racist or sexist?

Make the fat kid run..

Children need to be weighed at school to help tackle New Zealand's spiralling obesity and diabetes rates, an expert says.


I hope they didn't pay the expert too much because he's clearly an idiot. Weighing kids is like microchipping dogs, it doesn’t actually fix the problem. Here's the scenario from the point of view of the already overworked, under paid and under resourced teacher:


Step on the Scales son. Right. It's confirmed. You're a fat little shit. Now what do we do?

A real expert would know that a fat kid is fairly easy to spot without scales and suggest 3 simple remedies that might get the ball shaped child moving.

1: Ride your bike or walk to school.

2: Play weekend sport.

3: Take away the TV / Xbox / Computer and make them go outside and play and have friends.

The same applies to adults by the way, although if you're fat and offended right now, ask yourself if you're happy with your body and physical capabilities. If you are, great! Do whatever you want but ONLY if you're happy. That's what being an adult is about. Unfortunately, we don't want the fat kid to end up like you.

Remember though, fatties are people too with feelings, hopes, dreams, love to give and receive and contributions to make. They just need to be encouraged to eat less and move more.

Back by popular request..

Ok, so I'm sitting in our home office prepping furiously for monday's show and a face appears at the window. Anna's in Sophie's room feeding so I'm all alone. This is the face that appeared.


Yep, Bung.. The neighbours cat is now sitting on the bbq on our porch looking in at me, so I grab Thomas, the huge orange thing that we own and throw him out the cat door to take the intruder down and they both just sit there and have the equivalent of a cats tea party.

I should be proud really, our previous boofhead of a cat who would quite happily beat the snot out of the neighbourhood dogs has made friends with the 'differently abled' cat next door.

You may remember the last time Bung featured in this blog.

Live music is good

Donald Reid and Carly Binding are about to go on tour. Had them in the studio today and they're quite good. Expect chilled shows. Accoustic, intimate like. Buy a ticket, you won't be disappointed!




July 11th Tuesday Tauranga Home Bar
July 12th Wednesday Whakatane Boiler Room
July 13th Thursday Gisborne Sessions
July 14th Friday Napier Shed 2
July 15th Saturday Masterton Stellar Bar
July 17th Monday Timaru Coast
July 18th Tuesday Oamaru The Last Post
July 19th Wednesday Invercargill The Cabbage Tree
July 20th Thursday Queenstown Dux De Lux
July 21st Friday Dunedin Arc Cafe
July 22nd Saturday Christchurch Dux De Lux
July 25th Tuesday Nelson Yaza Café Bar
July 26th Wednesday Blenheim Copper Bock
July 27th Thursday Palmerston North The Bathhouse
July 28th Friday Wellington San Fran Bath House
August 3rd Thursday Whangarei Deluge Restaurant & Bar
August 4th Friday Auckland The Classic
August 5th Saturday Auckland Masonic Tavern

Impressions

Maximum respect for anyone who can do impressions or accents. It's a rare skill and one to be applauded, also quite handy in a radio show.

I've got a good Scooby Doo, not a bad Chewbacca, a fairly good bunch of silly voices that can be applied to otters, onions and various other newsworthy flora and fauna. My David Lange needs work and while I can do an Irish accent with the best of them, I can't do anything else from north of the equator without falling back into the Irish.

Imagine my surprise and delight when I discovered that my 2 1/2 week old daughter does an excellent Pope impression.


Meanwhile, bit of a change round this week. I get to do the afternoon show. Our afternoon host, Bunty is on leave so we've all shuffled up a place. He has incidentally executed a top piece of work with the new boss by going away, and lending the new boss his car. Fine move that. Wish I'd thought of it. The excellent Nick Logan fills in for me.

I like working days, I get to use Auckland's award winning public transport system. Ahem.