As I write this, I'm home with toothache. Yesterday, I seriously thought I was going to die, I would have quite happily taken out a second mortgage just to take the pain away and I think dentists know this, hence the need to often contact the bank as soon as a toothache becomes noticeable.

I called Camille and the boss to tell them I wasn't coming in although later that evening, I came right. Called everyone again to say hey, I'll probably be ok and then woke up at 4am in agony again, fired off a text to say, actually, you are on your own today and moaned my way back to sleep.

Now after another antibiotic, 2 Nurofen, and a Panadol I realise the immense power of painkillers. (I even considered filching off with the Tramol left over from when Anna gave birth but thought better of it.) I'm on a rollercoaster of feeling shitty and feeling ok. My day consists of grumping at the kids for being noisy and counting how many hours it's been since I took my last pill and when I can take another one.

Upshot, or smack to the jaw, depending on what way you look at it, is that the offending wisdom tooth needs to come out and I have an appointment for March 9. I asked the dentist, why is it that wisdom teeth acting up is a normal thing? Shouldn't evolution have gotten our pie holes right by now? So he told me this interesting fact.

Our mouths and jaws are getting smaller, however, our teeth aren't just yet.

This means that there's not enough room in our collective gobs to fit all our teeth, meaning that the last ones - the wisdom teeth - get into strife. Perhaps it's also recession related.
"I'm sorry Mr Wisdom tooth but due to current economic times, we're going to have to let you go..."
Then you and I, the Company Directors of our bodies have to pay out the wisdom teeth in a strange sort of redundancy arrangement where the wisdom teeth don't get the cash to tide them over until their next job, but the oral surgeon does instead.

I should be back at work tomorrow, the Augmentin should have returned the back of my jaw to a more useful size in order to talk and the pain will hopefully have subsided. However, IF I say anything offensive or 'off' tomorrow, blame the drugs.


  1. oh hun so feel for you 'empathy not sympathy' as at dentist last week who booked me for a root canal in march arghh but all his poking and prodding sent me to A & E overnight - got the wench of a tooth out late last wednesday - pull pull pull if you can! (the tooth babe... the tooth!) :)

  2. Oh for God's sake Dave, toothache?? Try having a baby - right Anna??
    Get over it.

  3. Dave, we'll have to take you to the petrol station and get you a couple of litres of Harden Up. A real man would have gone to the shed, got the pliers and ripped the b@#stard out!

  4. OMG that pic is 'sgusting! Gimme a pash!!!

  5. Trac, thank you. Your thoughts are kind and wise.

    Vic, I've taken one day off work with the tooth. Whenever you chicks have a baby, you want a whole year off! It all evens out in the end.

    Tony, thanks for your advice, unfortunately, I'm unable to take 'real man' advice from a man who hires computer nerds for a living.

    Steph, if you think that's sexy, you should smell my breath!